Infinite

There are people who make you feel old.
There are people who make you feel young.
And then there are those who make you feel infinite...

Be one of those people.

Seven.

Seven.

The number after eight
the holy number in some religions
seven lives,
seven skies

Seven, her favorite number

She used to ink it on her wrist,
scribble it on her notebooks and boxes and love notes.

Seven, her favorite number

It is the count of the scars
imprinted on her forearms,
they've been there since her birth, they say.

Seven, her favorite number

It was when she was seven
that she had dreams declaring her darkened destiny

Seven, her favorite number

Her name seven letters,
her life seven stories
seven shades of blood
through seven blades,
seven death and seven fades

Seven, her favorite number

Seven sins of seven sacrificed souls
on the seventh sacred hour
of the seventh moon
with the seven spells,
each with seven words...

Seven was her favorite number

Love is contrast

Love is pure and stained.
It is both heaven and hell.
It hurts and heals.
It saves and kills.
It can be tragic and true.
For a while or forever.

Love is both nothing and everything.
It makes us weak and strong.
It makes us hate.
It makes us love.
It is both good and evil.
It is a sacrifice.
It is also a thief and a gift.

Love is death and life.
A selfishness and selflessness. Reasonable yet unreasonable.

Love can be defined by words but can only be felt.

But that's what love is...

She's a shooting star

Sometimes when the nights are too dark, and if you’re lucky enough, you’ll see a shooting star.

She’s beautiful and bright just like those shooting stars you see at night. And you’ll wish upon her and write about her stories that would mark your destiny. She’s rare, one of a kind and you’d feel lucky you have even laid eyes upon her.

And then you’ll start wishing that you could be her, that you had her, that you could hold that shining light and store it in a glass jar away from everyone else so she could light up your world when its dark.

But you forget that she’s nothing like she seems.

She’s much bigger than she seems. You can’t mold her or hold her. She has come into existence for a higher purpose- to shine in the sky and not to rust on these grounds. And she’s so much more complicating when you try to get to know her.

She’s here for just a moment, a visit, a glimpse and then she’s gone. She burns everything in her way. She was born to burn, shine and fall, break down till she’s nothing but ashes.

She was meant to die for the wishes of others to come true.

She was meant to be just a fairy tale in a book.

She was meant to be an eternal lost memory.

She was meant to be a shooting star.

splatter

i feel like we’re all just glasses of milk and this world keeps shaking us and shaking us, wanting to spill us across the kitchen floor, but we’ve all grown so scared of being knocked over that we do everything in our power not to.

i think though, that we have spill and we have to splatter. we have to leave parts of ourselves where we go and who we touch. i think it’s the only way to be remembered.

maybe we’re all just scared of spilling all of ourselves onto a canvas only to fall down and realize we have nothing more to give, but i think you have feel empty before you can feel full.

there’s always more you can give but maybe you have to stand in the rain for awhile to figure that out.

People like me

People like me
will love you so hard
that you turn into stone

I will take you to
parks and museums
and kiss you
in every beautiful place
so that you can
never go back to them
without tasting us,
like blood in your mouth

Do not get close to
people like me.

I am like a bomb,
when our time is up
I will explode loss
all over your walls
in angry colors
that make you fucking
hate me and wish
your doorway never
lead to me

You will get lost
in the desperation
in the longing for something
that is always there
but never able to hold
onto it for good

Do not fall in love
with people like me.
I will destroy your home.
I will throw apologies at you
that shatter on the floor
and cut your feet

People like me...
we will leave.
we always do.

Love & Rage

I have love inside of me like you can scarcely imagine.

I have rage inside of me like you would not believe.

If I cannot satisfy the one,

I will indulge the other.

complexities

loving someone for their mind and all its complexities is possibly the greatest thing you can do for someone.

A million times

You could cut me a million times,

Each time a little deeper than the last.

And each time,

I will clean my blood off of your knife, And bring it back to you with a smile.

Paths

Sometimes, people don’t fit into each other’s lives.

There are specific amounts of space we’ve allotted for people, things, and places in our lives, whether consciously or inadvertently. And even if you wanted to, there are things you cannot cut out or rearrange to make them fit.

Blaming yourself for things going wrong, people leaving, situations not working out the way you’d like them to is a simple solution--and so is blaming the other person. Simple, yes, but it is also detrimental.

You are going different places than everyone else, on an individual path that you’ve been walking your whole life. This path may change every so often and split into new ones and you will make turns and come to forks in the road, but the beauty of it is that the path is yours.

The sadness is that you can't just pull someone onto your path because you want them there with you.

Sometimes I think the only conclusion, is that maybe you’ve got to walk your path and go on your journey and learn to love the people and places and things you find there, instead of always trying to merge roads. Sometimes it’s just a test of character, whether we can remain content or feel the need to change course to keep who we want with us.

Let people go when they need to change their lives, and learn how to leave and be left when you need to change yours.

It hurts.
It is selfish.
It is necessary.

And maybe one day, you will see them in a coffee shop, lock eyes, and be taken by surprise. You will have stories to share about the places your paths have taken you, and you will be happy for each other for a moment without letting the sadness of forgotten friendship leak into your heart...or your coffee :)

Maybe you'll never see them again. Maybe you'll never hear their laugh, see that sparkle in their eyes or kiss their lips. Maybe that part of your life is gone, and it won’t come back even for a moment.

But maybe, this is perfectly okay...because its part of your path.

Every decision

Decide in your heart what really makes you happy and challenges you, and start moving your life in that direction.

Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow, and the day after that. Look at who you want to be, and start sculpting yourself into that person.

You may not get exactly where you thought you’d be, but you will be doing things that are good for you, and doing things that you believe in.

Don’t let life randomly kick you in the ass and make you who and what you don't wanna become.

back roads

i want to go on a road trip. just you, me, the highway, and the radio. the blue sky, the back roads, and windows down. we’ll talk about everything and nothing, and we’ll sing our hearts out. and we’ll make memories we’ll never, ever forget. just you and me

imagine

Could you imagine how much better the world would be if people were just thankful to be alive? There are so many people out there who take advantage of the beautiful life they have. Meanwhile, there are others who are struggling to stay alive but still appreciate every second they get.

Just remember that life’s a gift!

So be thankful....

One day

As I turned to step onto that train for the last time and never look back, I heard her whispering; "When you leave, just remember you have my heart, so keep it where ever you are love. And if you want to be with me again, then please bring it back. No matter who I'm with or where I am at, I'm sure you can find me. And nobody will make me as happy as you have. You are an amazing person and always will be amazing to me. And when I have a bad day-like everyday- all I have to do is think of you and smile that I got to have such an amazingly wonderful person in my life. Maybe that one day will come around when we will cross paths again, and it will be the right time for us to be together. I will never stop waiting for you baby. I will never let you go. I will never stop loving you....Ever...." -TS

it's odd.

i watch people.

and not like the regular people watching, but that i actually observe them.

i see how they do things, how they talk, how their facial movements are.

when someone talks to me, im studying them while im looking at them.

i think about why they said what they did and try to understand.

i see someone and they instantly remind me of someone, because ive seen that same action done before.

its odd.

but i like it.